Well...whatever!

I was chatting with my friend on the phone, gossiping about the guy we drooled over,when the doorbell rang.

God stood at the door, unsmiling but not rude.I was surprised by His sudden appearance, and quite forgot that my ear was still glued to the phone.I made a quick recovery though, told my friend that I would call her back, and turned to God- who had stood patiently at the door throughout my lost-and-recovery stage.

"Oh,it's you. Haven't seen you around in a long time. What's up? Come on in!" I said half-heartedly as I gestured Him to come in. God stepped in and looked at me.

"Thank you for letting me in. I thought you wouldn't even let me inside the house now that you don't let me inside your mind". Ah,the direct jabs - nothing had changed!

"You know it's not true. I do remember you. Why do you always have to do this drama I don't understand", I tried to turn the tables at Him,but deep inside I knew what He said was true.

God guffawed loudly "The only time you remember me is when I don't give you something you wished for. The rest of times you behave as if whatever happened was coincidence".

I looked on uncomfortably,knowing fully well that I couldn't possibly lie to God. I sighed and told Him " Well yeah. True. Anyway everything is science. All the religious stuffs are all lies. Just to fool the gullible. We don't need no God. Even you're a figment of my imagination!"

I knew I was harsh. After all even figments of imagination need to be dealt with kindly.

" And that's all you've thought of me after all this time we spoke?" He said in the most dramatic way. Sigh! He was behaving like a possessive boyfriend!

" No, not really...." I tried to do damage control

" It's all right my child. It is indeed difficult for faith to sustain in these times. Only the valiant and the determined can have faith that can withstand the test of times.Cliched, I know", He smiled kindly at me.

I felt bad. An inexplicable feeling of anxiety engulfed me. Like I am about to lose something precious forever.

I suppose God sensed my feelings. He smiled wider, almost grinned and said " So you're extending your membership with the believer's club right? Good. I can now continue to play games in my new phone. Meanwhile, I'll drop in to say hello sometimes. Ciao"

I gaped at Him in wonder,while he fished out his mobile,plopped onto the sofa and started playing games.

Incurable.

The Feminism? (Milder version!)

"Hey you should leave the seat right now!" shouted a woman so loudly that everyone nearly jumped for a moment.The lady in question had her eyes fixed on the guy who had managed to grab a seat but unfortunately,the seat was a 'ladies seat' , which is a common site in all city buses in the metros in India. The guy mumbled something like "having fever, please" and really looked ill. The woman shook her head and said more loudly this time "ladies seat pa,yendri" (get up,its the ladies seat).The man looked at the conductor-who had come up seeing the commotion- for some support.But all he got was the conductor throwing up his hands in air to show helplessness and told him to find another seat.The man finally gave up and the woman had finally won the who-grabs-the-ladies-seat contest.

Let me analyse the woman now.

Educated? She's texting away on her Samsung phone. Check.
Working? She's got a Tupperware lunchbag. Check.

No, I am not interested in whether she's married or not by the way, but I do recall she got on the bus from a place which had an IT company right next to it. I can imagine this woman proclaiming she's a feminist and look at men with a "you rapist!" kinda look.Stereotyping, I know. But the thing about stereotypes is that they're unfortunately been true at some point of time.

So,where is the feminism? What is it teaching? That men are lesser beings and women are the sole goddess and nurturer and all those fancy words? That women are strong yet need that special ladies seat in the bus to rest their tired legs?

Duh.Please, give me a break. Let me be clear for once.

Feminism is about equality. Not about female superiority.

Equal pay for equal jobs? Great! Then why no paternity leaves like maternity leaves?
Equal job opportunities? Awesome! Why then there can't be more househusbands?
Equal education? I agree! Then why lesser fees for girls?

Honestly,being a woman myself, I obviously would not go on a war against my own gender. But please! There's nothing special for being either gender (only difference being the X chromosome, which actually makes all the difference!). So, there is no god gifted special power in my hands that would magically turn all dishes tasty, nor is a man the ultimate protector/saviour/whatever of women.

To be more philosophical, its all in the mind.Deal with it!

P.S : The man got another empty seat, the woman in the bus got down in the next stop, and I took that seat ;)

Hasn't your mother taught you anything?

In a popular women's magazine, I came across this question in response to a query raised in one of it's agony aunt type columns : Hasn't your mother taught you anything?

Whoa! Now THAT's weird! Essentially the lady wished to know how could she best manage home and work since she doesn't find time after a hard day at work and the house remains a mess or she isn't able to cook a lot of stuffs and her dear hubby also gets angry since he wishes to invite his friends over.

And in response she's asked (not even in a subtle manner) that whether her mother has not taught her anything regarding household work.

What.The.Hell

Yes,its imperative people dig into upbringing and environment ; but the question was simple : tips on how to manage job and work?
The answer can include getting help from the husband (which wasn't mentioned at all), knowing easy-to-make recipes,hiring a maid (as simple as that!) and so on.

But the response had me rattled.

Why do we get into personal comments about people whom we haven't met or are not close with?
Also, why we still presume all the girls should be brought up to be ideal wives and daughter-in-laws ; while it is assumed that a man would be the bread-winner for the family?Why can't we steer clear of stereotypes? Why can't we accept  stay-at-home dads or  career oriented women without much fuss?

In this case,what does it have to do if her mother taught her anything or not?! Perhaps she wanted her daughter to be able to earn so that she's financially secured and stands on her own in the society !(Not knowing the same society still measures a woman's success on her homemaking skills alone)

Heck! Why do we even need to bother about other people's decisions at all?Are you going to suffer from stomach cancer if your neighbour is a stay-at-home dad and the wife is the CEO of a company? No,right?

Lets all try not to judge people (see? Am not judging the person who gave that advise :-D) and instead just focus on the situation at hand.We've got more important works to do rather than judging people and giving them unnecessary and outrageous advice, don't we?

Cheers!
Have a breezy week ahead! :-)

Be like the Bee!

A honey bee,while on its quest to get its nectar to make honey,does two jobs - get the nectar,and help in cross pollination of flowers.

When nature itself has examples of peaceful coexistence,then shouldn't we,as the evolved "intelligent" race,introspect our lives too?

Imagine a big house where you live alone. A big car you drive on your own.
Exotic cuisine no one to explore with.
Loneliness being a friend is a myth.

The purpose of our lives is fulfilled when we help others directly or indirectly.What goes around,comes around. This I learnt in a short story by Enid Blyton in which one person does a good deed to another and tells him or her to " pass it on". This cycle of good deeds eventually reach back to the person ( a small kid) who started this chain! ( thank you Enid Blyton for your meaningful bedtime stories!! )

How do we incorporate that in our lives?
See that old lady afraid to cross the road?Take her hand and help her cross.See the small boy unable to reach a favourite biscuit packet in the supermarket? Just take that packet and hand it to him with a smile.See that man struggling with loads of bags with him? Help him out.See that unhappy acquaintance? Listen to her woes sincerely and offer support.

Be like the honey bee. Help others. Spread smiles!You'll not only find the honey of happiness,you'll also find the smiling flowers you've helped to blossom :-)

Cheers! Have a smiling week ahead!!
:-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

Being a Bad Friend

Okay! So this has been in my mind for many months now,but I had been delaying it purposely.After all,admitting you're a bad friend is a difficult thing to do!

Yes,am a bad friend.Like really a bad friend.And that's the reason why I hate Facebook too.I guess I show signs of the Facebook Syndrome when I say how much I yearn to have friends who would dedicate a Status,put up my pic with them,or just put up some quirky status for me....No no please don't do those now!

The point is,I am a terrible friend.I already said that,right? Going down the memory lane,I miss so many of my friends.Unfortunately am one of those silent sufferers who put up a facade of "Oh I don't care!" but deep down,the memories of a friendship haunt me,making me painfully miss my friends and those "good" times.

Have I tried to be in contact? Tried to plan some outing of sorts?Some get-together?Movie?Gossip session?I guess the answer is no.Sigh.

Maybe they don't even think about me.Oh,thats the harder part.To accept that they've moved on.How'll I go on about pulling them unwillingly to the days-that-were mode when they're like "Yeah it was.So?"

But I do remember birthdays.It's the wishing that I don't do.

Am behaving like a person out of a newly broken up relationship,ain't I?

Well,Friendship is important.To me at least.But unfortunately my vocal chords go on a holiday whenever I wish to express that "You're my friend! I always cherish your friendship!"

Oh well,time to move on for me too I guess.All this rant would do me no-good.

Wait a minute.Hey! That's an old friend of mine.She's sent a friend request! You think she remembered me,that's why send a request? Or just a random act of adding someone she knows?

That's anybody's guess!

Cheers...Have a happy month ahead!

Life after marriage

Before you jump into any conclusions regarding the title,let me assure you that yes,its meant purely for seeking attention and no, I haven't got married yet. 

Marriage is an important phase of our lives. Specially in India,where marriage is one big occasion and much hullabaloo surrounds it,marriage ceases to remain what it actually is- bonding of two people.Its so complex that everyone has just accepted it in its current and simple forms-rituals,gifts,the expectations from the bride/groom, and in some cases,dowry.But look beyond that,its just the lifelong sharing of companionship for two people,bonded in friendship and complete acceptance of each other.But is it always really just the two people?

I am digressing from what I intend to share.And that is about marriage.Not mine; but my brother's.

Am sure I'll be too happy when he gets married to whoever he likes.And thats around a year or so away,or maybe more.Just a year or so away.

I was talking to my mother about my...well...apprehensions.My brother getting married? That means he'll no longer tease me or make fun of me or irritate me? No more physical fights (OK don't worry,those are mild ones)? No more fighting about who would be driving the car? No more passing around food items to him since I can't eat more of it?No more fighting for the TV? No more laughing together at silly things?No more of his grave advices which I don't understand at all?No more verbal altercations?

My mom was surprised as I kept on asking more of such irrelevant questions.And she didn't really know how to tackle them.All she said was "We're sharing it all with a new family member na?Why are you worrying?"

I still wasn't convinced.Then my mom said "Imagine in future your husband has a sister and she also thinks like you do now,won't you be hurt?"

Of course,since my brother would be getting married first I hadn't thought about my own marriage.But that got me thinking.She had a point.

And after lots and lots of thinking,I got to understand one cliche .Nothing is life remains as it is.Niether the tangible things like house,cars or mementoes nor the intangible ones like relationships,phases and memories.All I have to do is cherish the memories,not bind it with me or try to recreate the same.It can't be done at all :)

So,I guess I should welcome the new bride (whoever he chooses),and make her feel at home in our eccentric but loving family.

I hopped upon happily with this thought,till my brother pulled my plait.

And then,a fight ensued.

God and me...talk about inequality!

"I hate you God",I grumbled.

"What's your complaint now?",God asked lightly,enjoying His cold coffee topped with chocolate ice cream.

"Why did you create women to serve men? Can't it be other way round? Don't women have any identity?Don't women deserve some care and respect?"

"What? When did I say women are born to serve men?",He asked,mildly surprised but still not leaving His cold coffee.

"The scriptures say so.Some sage has said that that's how God willed the Earth to be.With men being in command and women feeling lucky to be able to serve them.",I was almost fuming now,ready to pour out my temper.

"Hold on now,don't say like that.Let me just recollect about what happened millenia ago.....ya now I get it! Ha! See,I'll share this video with you,and you judge based on that about who did what,okay?",God handed me His super-phone to view the video.

***

Adam and Eve are resting in some garden.Adam turns to Eve and says "Hey! I don't think we can survive on fruits whole year.These take time to grow.I saw some funny looking white seeds that seems edible enough to eat.We'll try boiling them in water to clean them.I'll pick those up and we'll give it a try.What do you think?"

"You read my mind so well! I was going to seek your opinion about the same!"

Adam smiles,"Am so lucky to have you,you and I think on the same lines"

The next day,Adam is busy collecting the 'white seeds' and Eve fills water and boils it.Adam had to travel to and fro to the fields and back since he had no bag or sack to collect the white seeds.Meanwhile,Eve removed the chaffs as they seemed to taste bitter and but the seeds one by one onto the boiling water.

The seeds did seem edible but there was still some more exploration to be done.

Adam lay down beside Eve,tired, and asked her if she could massage his legs.Eve happily did it,after which a grateful Adam offered to massage Eve's neck which was aching after all the bending over the boiling water.

They found the correct way to cook rice,and taught that to their children too.

The clan grew and grew.It was established that the women will stay at home and cook,while the men bring in the raw materials.And women shall serve their partners while the men take rest.

The great-great-great-great-granddaughter of Adam and Eve once opined,"I want to go out hunting too"

Her brothers laughed,and told her to stay at home and cook.

"But why?"

"That's what your great-great-great grandmother did!",they replied in chorus.

***

I was still trying to get the meaning of the video,while God was happily licking off the cream from the glass.

"So what does this mean? Does that give you the right to write inscriptions that say women are nothing but servants for looking after home?"

God sighed."You spoiled the positive after effects of having a cold coffee.My dear Ms. Ignorant,did I write the inscriptions?"

"Well I guess you authorised some human to write",I said,feeling a little less confident.

"Then you see,thats how human beings are.They don't want to change.They like the order that has been set for them since ages to remain intact.They don't like confrontations.They don't like to try something new with each generation.They don't want to do anything else!"

"But then what is the difference between humans and donkeys?",I asked,confused.

God grinned."It's not enough to be born human.You have to prove that you are one!"

And He went off to get a blackcurrant milkshake.

P.S: 

No disregard or disrespect towards Adam and Eve.Or donkeys.Just a tiny attempt at trying to reconstruct the events based on my thoughts.

We don't know if it's right when we say women have been made to serve men since time immemorial.It can be that as the society 'progressed',the relationship between men and women became unequal,creating more of a Master and Slave,instead of having love and respect.

So let me assume that it all started fine,but somewhere in the middle,it got tangled into the monotonicity of "the tried and tested" scenario.

Do think about it once :)

Cheers! Have a happy week ahead!

Taking care of a place called home!!!

My to-do list these days include:
1.Buy milk
2.Buy vegetables
3.Buy dals
4.Pay bills
5.Empty the dustbin
6.Cook (!!!!)
7.Wash utensils
8.Cook lunch for office
9.Wash clothes
10.Switch off lights before going out

No,I am not married yet (Thank you for your well-intentioned guesses that I seem to have got married).I am living in a rented apartment which somehow transformed me from a carefree girl to a always-thinking-about-what-to-cook home-maker.

Yes,I am now a home-maker without being married.I know loads and loads of girls and woman lead such life,then what is so special about me living like this? Well nothing actually.But still,its kinda different ;)

Now my day starts with the thought for what I'll cook for lunch-actually the thought starts appearing since night,before going to bed and I get dreams about me cooking up exotic dishes for lunch! Then much of the times in office I am asked "So,what did you cook today?",with some well-meaning suggestions and advices thrown in between.In fact,once when I recounted to a colleague of mine how I forgot to add onions to my Sambar and next time forgot about the dal,she(who will be getting married in a few months),got an "insight" into the life of an early-morning-lunch-box-making young girl(and her silence indicated she's a bit apprehensive about her life post marriage :-D)

I now realise how tough it is for my mom (not just mine,but for everyone's moms)to cook and keep the home tidy and handle our tantrums and et all.Sorry mom...I won't ever pester you to make my favourite dishes the next time I am home,I'll eat whatever you cook (which would inevitably be my favourite dishes ;) )

Sometimes this freedom is exhilarating.You can cook your favourite dishes (Am I ranting too much about food??),you can throw around your things anywhere and you'll learn to be independent(Yeah,now I know whom to call when I spot a cockroach or centipede!)

On the downside,you would inevitably feel lonely(because walls have ears,not a mouth),after a hard day at work you'd wish someone would be there at home who'd take care of the dishes lying in the kitchen sink,that the dust and dirt wouldn't dance around beneath your feet,that all you got to do is come home,eat,and sleep,that you don't need to go by yourself each time the groceries reach a danger mark,and that the only other thing that talks in your home is not the TV!

*Sigh*

Circumstances(and mostly my adamant opinions and thoughts) have brought me here.Lets see where life takes me from here.Any guesses? (Please don't start about what a wonderful wife I'll be blah blah blah....I have an overdose of that talk!)

P.S:
If you have any suggestions/recipes for easy cooking(vegetarian, please) do drop in your comments ;)
Cheers! Have a great weekend :)

Why NO to learning new languages?

Recently,I was looking over the comments section of a forum wherein the discussion was about "How to stop people from using regional language in Meetings?".From just meetings,the discussion drifted to Hindi speaking vs Non-Hindi speaking people.There were people who were giving out statements like "Why should we learn Hindi?".That got me thinking.

What's so bad about learning Hindi? A lot of states speak that language.A lot of languages have words similar to those in Hindi.Don't believe me?

Tu kasa aala?
Tum kaise aaye?/Tu kaise aaya?
How did you come?
That's Marathi.

Tumar Naam Ki?
Tumhara naam kya hai?
What is your name?
That's Assamese.

Tume mo sahita asiba ki?
Tum mere saath aayoge kya?
Will you come with me?
Thats Oriya.

Tussi ki kitta?
Tumne kya kiya?
What did you do?
That's Punjabi

For all those familiar with Hindi would realise that the words are similar and can be derived 
from Hindi,to some extent at least.
Now lets get to Non-Hindi derived languages.

Unga peru enna?
What is your name?
Thats Tamil

Ninte perentaanu?#
What is your name?
Thats Malayalam
#(Sounds familar to Tamil's peru which means Name)

Avashyavaghi* koduthene
Yes of course.
That's Kannada
*(Sounds similar to Hindi's Avashya,which means the same as the meaning mentioned here)

Idhi javaabu**
It is the answer/This is the answer
That's Telugu
**(Sounds similar to Tamil's Idhu which means "this" and Hindi's Jawaab)

So you see,if we learn one North Indian language,and one South Indian language,am sure we'll be able to understand and grasp other languages more easily.After all,in this age of migration and all that,we don't want to lose out on opportunities just because of few sound movements which our tongue favours!We're ready to learn French and Japanese,right? Then why not a language nearer?From our own Country?(I know that sounds a cliched excuse.Oh well,there must be some iota of truth in it maybe ;) )

What else is language anyway? Its just a medium of communication.It won't do anyone harm if we try to learn one or two more.Its not about forcing anyone to learn.Its just being sensible :)

P.S: I am not a language expert,nor I know most of the Indian languages.But these are the very few similarities that I could find between different languages.When the languages themselves have an invisible connection amongst themselves,then what are we fighting about? :)
And also,I just picked out the examples which I thought could best support this post.And am sincerely sorry to any mistakes (I copied from online),and am sorry if anyone's sentiments were hurt (though I wonder why they should be hurt anyway?)

Cheers...Have a Happiiiieeeeeeee Week Ahead ! :)

And I thought men and women were equal

Shahrukh Khan says declares virtuously in a tea ad "From now,the actress name will appear before mine in my upcoming films."

It makes me wonder,how doing that will increase the respect for women anywhere?

Why couldn't the ad instead say "From now,the names of actress and actor will appear together".

Each day on facebook we see posts that portray women as great demi-gods,sacrificing machines,those with unconditional love...everything angelic but not humans.

Why can't we instead focus on being equals,neither great nor worse.After all,there are only two types of human beings- Man and Woman.Yes,there are biological differences,but if there is an equality instead of fight for superiority,much of the conflict would be resolved.

What do you think?


P.S: I guess this is my shortest post ever.

The line between equality and bias is sometimes too bleak to be noticed.What becomes "Equality" for one becomes "Bias" for another.After all,it's not that men are just unemotional,feelingless creatures.They have feelings too.

In the name of God

"What is religion?" I asked God,who was sitting beside me trying to work on his new smart phone.

"Huh..?What?",God asked back,His eyes still glued to the touch screen.

"Can you put that phone down and answer my question?I asked what is religion." I said,getting irritated.

"Well,religion is a way of life",He smiled as if He had given a very intelligent answer.

"I know that quote,thank you very much.But what is religion?"

He sighed."Why do I have to endure your questions and accusations everytime! All right,let me give an example.You have been to school,right?".At this,I glared angrily.

"OK OK! Just joking! What do you remember about school? Don't tell me answers like sharing lunchboxes,not doing homework,punishments,scores et cetra.Just give the physical stuffs you remember about school.Something that helped people know you're in school".

"Oh that must be the Uniform!",I answered thoughtfully.

"Exactly.Now the uniform serves not much of a purpose except telling you which school you belong to,and that everyone in the school is equal.Religion does the same.It just tells others what food you eat,what time you remember Me in the day, how you go about your daily chores everyday,and how you celebrate some victory."

"Oh is that all? Then why did you make those sacred texts,those religious bhajans,slokas,hyms,and prayers?And what about the customs,and traditions?" I asked accusingly.

He laughed."Oh yeah I do know all the languages,but seriously,those texts were just opinions on how to reach Me.I know all that sounds complex,but its very simple actually.Be good,do good,think good,and you'll find the way to reach me".He smiled merrily.

"Then why do people kill each other in the name of God?",I asked,wide eyed,almost knowing the answer yet feeling afraid.

He kept silent for sometime,and then,in a low voice,said "I didn't make religion.I don't care if you pray to me early morning,afternoon,or even midnight.I don't care much if you keep your forehead barren or keep it colourful,I don't care if you think of me silently or if you pour tons of milk over my idol.All I care for is,if you're doing good to others.Being good doesn't mean you donate some money to charity and then think I'll be happy.No! A kind word,gesture,an unexpected help,a loyal word,acceptance-that is what makes me happy.Not mere hymns and prayers.And yet humans think one's way of life is superior to other! Bah! It doesn't matter at all.Did you concentrate on your school uniform while sitting in class?No.You must have just thought about your friends,classes,subjects,exams scores and all that.But see now?People kill each other for their way of life." He looked hurt.

"Ooh okay.Don't be upset!Am sure the new generation with people like me will not fight over each others' way of life",I smiled at Him.

"Yeah,I hope so",He smiled too.

"So,what were you doing with your new Smart Phone?",I changed the topic.

"Was searching for some bhajans on the phone's internet",He said,turning His gaze back to the touch screen.

I stared at him.

"What?Can't I listen to people praising about me? You know,am quite upset right now." He feigned a hurt expression.

Sigh.In the name of God!

P.S:
For all those who despise other people's religion,look into your own and you'll find flaws in yours too.
Let us not fight in the name of God,because even though we all belong to some religion/sect/groups,no too people will have the same way of doing their day-to-day work.

Truth is stranger than fiction

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 37; the thirty-seventh edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. The theme for the month is "Truth is stranger than fiction"

- See more at: http://www.blogaton.in/2013/03/blogaton37.html#sthash.NcaAi8np.dpuf

"Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities,Truth isn't".
-Mark Twain

The truth always has this effect on people-it leaves us numb,with a strange sense of resignment,an inexplicable sense of peace,and an inevitable acceptance of destiny.

Our lives,when we look at it from the outside,seems quite good.Family,friends,work,plans,achievements and et all.But when you scratch the surface and look deeper,what we find is a sense of purposelessness.

I am not too religious,rather am more philosophical.And yet,I realise why Krishna's sermon in Mahabharata,which is the Bhagvad Gita, is called the Ultimate Truth-because there is one and only.I don't intend to promote Hinduism,as will be apparent from my other posts in my blog,but I would just tell you what I or anyone who has read a few chapters in the book would feel-its distressing.Seriously.You open a book and read that whatever you've done in your life is a sin,and that your existence is just a speck in this whole big sea called universe,then of course you're bound to feel upset! And this when I've just read a few pages :)

Unfortunately you can't really deny the whole concept at all,there is something convincing about it that you accept whatever is written (well,at least to some extent).

Our whole life is a fiction.The truth of it all comes when we lie on our deathbed,and at that time we can't fool anyone.We'll realise whatever we've done in this world,someone else would've also done it.Its like in a novel you replace a character with another one.Life moves on.People'll forget us,forget our existence.And all that remains constant is the truth of it all that everyone will face at a point of time.

So lets take into consideration whatever I've said and analyse our lives-why are we so restless? Why give so much importance to something that won't remain forever,like our name,job,money,fame etc.?

People kill infant girls because they want a son to take their family name forward.Why?For what?We can be more positive and have a happy,peaceful world,right?

We fail to give a much needed kind word,forgive someone,keep a grudge all our lives.

Let us try to erase the line between the truth and fiction in our lives.No,that doesn't mean I am suggesting we become another monk who solds his/her Ferrari,but we can try to be reduce our illusions.

More compassion,more empathy,more kindness and more patience.Imagine if all of us shed our fictitious identities,realise that deep down,all of us have the same end,then maybe we all can hope for a peaceful world?

Of course,the truth will remain the same,yet when we die,we can think of all the happy times and die peacefully :)

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. Introduced By: Pawan Maruvada, Participation Count: 3

- See more at: http://www.blogaton.in/2013/03/blogaton37.html#sthash.NcaAi8np.dpuf

Women - Burden or Backbone?

Entry for the blog contest :
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/blogs/induslady/8412-indusladies-4th-annual-international-women-page44.html#comments

I still remember a lesson in my Hindi syllabus ,when I in class 7th,which was titled 'Ladki'(Girl).Its the story of how the author comes across a household,where the daughter is ill-treated while the son is pampered endlessly.And all that the girl has to offer in answer for the question as to why she suffers without questioning why,is this line-"Ladki hoon na" (After all,I am a girl)

I wondered about how the girl has been conditioned to think (even though only in fiction) about how worthless she is just by being a girl.They grow up to think that they can't have their own wishes,desires,hopes,dreams because they're not even humans-just burden that has to be passed on from one authority to another.

Are women really a burden? They bind together a family,take care of everyone (blame the motherly hormones for that!) and all they recieve is disrespect? A tag of being a burden?

Its a cliche thats repeated often that women continue to remain daughters,while sons become husbands after marriage.Emotional stability (because women are more comfortable with displaying emotions),being a bread-winner when needed,protective-and yet a burden?

The girl in the story helped her mother,father and her arrogant brother with any and everything.And yet she was never once spoken to with a kind word by her mother.It would have been interesting to see how after growing up,the son would have taken up the responsibility of looking after the parents.

Women are working now,earning as much as their husbands,managing finances at home,managing kids...and yet when some of them look back to see how they were treated,its not respect for all this that they get.Instead,its the jeers about marriage-the expenditure they are causing,how she's lucky to have found a husband despite being educated,how her parents are worried about it all- is that all their life about?

Even though women have scaled heights,there are still families that are crestfallen when the nurse announces its a girl.

Are women a burden? Look at your mother,sister, or anyone who helps you around.You'll know the answer.

The craze for dance

Dance.Like no one is watching,like no one cares how you should be,like they're all in sync to your energy waves,like they connect to you that instant,like you feel you'll die this very moment,feeling your body gradually giving up to something out-of-this-world.

I love dancing.Although if my friends in school hear me telling this,they'd be surprised.I mean,if I love dancing,and consider myself as a "good" dancer,I should've gotten some prizes and all,right? But naah,that is not the case.In fact,I am so mad about dancing that I lose myself completely,in the process making a complete fool of myself in public.

I wonder how can anyone not really want to dance? When the music pumps up,your heart thumps on your chest,in rhythm with the surroundings,some strange happiness and excitement flowing in your blood,reaching out to your hands and legs, and it just overpowers you,letting you free,giving you a strange sense of elation.And that elation,is tiring.Trust me,at each step you shove your hands and move your legs,you'll feel you're throwing some part of you around,and nothing else is on your mind.Just you,your body,the music,and the happiness.Nothing else matters.

Oh well,this is a random musing of my random thoughts.So,lets get to the updates now:
1. Happy New Year 2013 everyone! (Yeah,this is my first post this year :D)
2.Thank you for all the Belated Birthday Wishes you'll post on my comment box (My Birthday was on 12th Feb :D )
3.No other update as of now...am in well and hope you are all in the same well :D

Cheers,have a Happy Weekend ahead! ;)

I'll be back

The battle that never ends

Okay everyone! I now join thousands of people across the internet who have poured out their anger and grief over the brutal,inhuman gangrape of the 23-year-old girl from Delhi which sent shockwaves across the nation.

At the outset,I would pray for the girl's soul,and hope she has moved on to a better place.A brave,spirited daughter.Why brave? Because instead of screaming "Ma,mujhe marr jaane do! Meri zindagi barbaad ho gayee hai! (Oh mother let me die! My life is finished!)"  like the rape victims in movies and tele-serials,she whispered "I want to live".And live she does,in the heart of millions who have been closely watching the case and been praying for her.

If the previous cases of rape and molestation(such as that of the Guwahati girl) had a stricter and swifter punishment,this girl would've been alive today, because then the men wouldn't have dared to do those horrid things they did to her.But they did.

And why? Because they thought they can get away with it.Even if the girl weren't beaten up like this,and she struggled to lodge an FIR,they may just say that they were "provoked",and the Court may have "observed" that the victim was wrong by taking the wrong bus at the wrong time,and her character would've come into question.

This is the glaring truth of India.A girl is raped and the policemen ask her the details of the act.In fact,policemen act like part-time priests when they suggest the victim marry her rapist.Why? So that he and his friends will continue to rape her,but this time,she won't lodge a complaint against her own husband.Because,according to the police and the Court,marital rape doesn't exist(In fact,they don't know the meaning of the term marital rape).

Rape is hardly ever a sexual act.Its an act of a physically strong but mentally weak guy, showing how superior he is on a woman who is not able to fight back (that explains the rape of 8-year-olds to 40-year-olds).How else can you explain 6 guys forcing themselves on a woman just to "teach her a lesson" because she fought back? Or have you wondered how a man can rape a small girl of around 7 years of age (or less)?They're sick,scared and inferiority-complex-suffering people who display their misplaced sense of masculinity.

So you see? Women and their clothes don't really instigate men to rape.Then what about the street harassment that women face everyday? That happens the same even if we wear mini-skirts or saree or salwar.

The point is,in this male dominated society of our country,women have been blamed and shamed into silence.This of course makes the younger (and impressionable) minds to think that whatever they do,"sab chalta hai" (all is fair).

NOT,if the government enforces a strict law against rapists and sexual offenders.That would make the men realise that women are human beings with feelings,who feel bad when some men obscenely comment about her butt,without even caring to lower their voices;who think any woman waiting for a bus at night wants to be laid for money;who judge a woman not by the work she does but the clothes she wears.

But what would make the government to take this step when the people who constitute the governing body think a woman would like to be raped just to get compensation from the government?And also when one minister insults another Chief Minister's character openly without thinking twice?That means,the problem lies with the attitude of people in general.

Its about time that parents teach their sons about respect and consent.But the rot runs too deep to be cleaned in a generation or two.Till then,we don't know how many such 23-year-olds will get raped and killed,how many 18-year-olds will commit suicide,and how many 8-year-olds will go on battling for justice.

Till then,we keep up the fight.And hope the sacrifice of this 23-year-old--a sacrifice she made so that the people of our great country stop turning a blind eye to something as drastic as rape--doesn't go in vain.

P.S:
Yes,I am feeling helpless.But what can I do? Is anyone listening?

Hypocrites and Spirituality!!!!

In my opinion,the hypocrites are the most spiritually enlightened people on Earth.You know hypocrites? Those who don't walk their talk,who brag about themselves,who say one thing and do something else? Yeah those! How? Lets find out.....

@School

S: Hey,you know what? I've fought with H.Am not going to talk to her ever again.
Me: Why what happened?
S: Don't ask! But its so painful,I don't wanna think about her.
Me(Dutifully not asking her further): OK.

Next day.

A: Hey why haven't S and H come yet?
Me: Oh they've got some tension between them.That's what S told me.Looks like an awful fight!

The door opens,and in come S and H,linking arms and giggling like they've been best friends since birth.

And here I am thinking that they're not gonna talk to each other ever!

And this is just a small,tiny,unimportant example.There are loads of other examples.
"I don't believe in dowry,but it would be nice if you do give some gold jewelry for the wedding."
"I am a feminist,but I do believe girls should not let career be a priority in their lives"
"I am a God-fearing person".Ha ha ha.
"I give my children the full freedom to pursue whatever they want to- either Engineering or M.B.B.S".

So where does spirituality come into picture?

Hypocrites don't care about what or how other people feel about them. Thats a strong spirituality aspect- just do your own work.
Hypocrites don't think twice about being bonded by the words they've uttered.
Hypocrites don't care that they forge bonds with people with whom they've sworn off all ties.That shows how they've conquered the Ego problem! (Till the time the work is done,of course!)
Finally,Hypocrites don't care about others-after all,one should be detached from wordly attachments!

Should we be Hypocrites too then? ;-)

Cheers....Have a happy week ahead!

P.S: This post is not intended to ridicule Spiritualism or whatever has been mentioned.Just a tiny wee bit sarcasm ;-)

The power of negative

Anything negative attracts immediate attention.A negative RH of a blood group,a dip in economy,a sad ending in a movie or book-they remain in our memory for a long time.

Imagine if in the movie Titanic,Jack hadn't died while saving Rose,instead he also found some plank to hang on to and is saved....would it have had the same impact.You may argue that the destruction of Titanic was what everyone felt bad about,but then,if there had not been any tragic love story put in,the movie would've resembled a documentary.

People lamenting about their personal problems is sure to gain more attention than those who go around with a smile trying to make people happy and cheerful.Yeah,ideally everyone doesn't like a person who goes on whining.But I guess its just human tendency to feel sorry for a person on the outside,while the brain is sadistically happy that "I am not the one affected".

Even stories having a sad ending remain etched in our memories.Why is Romeo Juliet more celebrated than some other love story having a happy ending?

Being positive and seeing the positive side of any situation is the simple mantra of a happy life.But really,its not that simple.Observe how your own thoughts wander when faced with a crisis.They'll take the easier way out-thinking negatively.Its something we aren't able to control.

Very few people have this ability to see the sunshine when its raining.We think they're unrealistic,because reality is actually very dark.Thats why dark matter in space gained more attention than the non-dark matters *:-D*.

So,who is right? The unrealistic or the realistic? Is it okay to let negativity rule our lives or try fighting with it?Is it really worth it?

P.S:
Quite a confusing post,isn't it? Well,thats how my thoughts are running about too! :-D

Cheers...have a happy  POSITIVE week ahead! :)

Picture Courtesy: Google 

Being different......

"Tell me about yourself",the woman asked me,

She had this duty to evaluate my personality,

To read between the words I speak,

To know if I can interact effectively.

I had come prepared for the question,

After all,all interviews had this in common,

I was about to answer,remembering the key points,

When the question echoed again and again in my mind.

"Who are you?",my mind asked me,

I was different,I knew that from the beginning,

But being different is not something others like,

Being different makes it hard for friendships to strike.

I was not different physically,nor had I problems with speech,

And yet,alienated from others,the society did teach,

To fall in line or fall by the wayside,

There is no place to run,no place to hide.

Sitting alone,roaming by myself,had become a part of me,

Those who felt sorry for me,offered me their company,

Of course I did join them,being more than happy,

And yet,it was so painful to be asked out of pity.

I wasn't mean,nor was I rude or dominating

I was kind and quite accomodating,

But I was different,this was painfully obvious,

I was known amongst teachers,yet unknown and lost.

Till then I had accepted,I was different and alone,

But the loneliness hurt more than breaking a bone,

Slowly,wiping away my tears,I changed myself to suit others,

And I was the happiest I got friends in the process.

But no one knows who I really am,

My questions,thoughts are restricted to my mind,

A veil of pretense I have drawn over me,

Now I am scared to let it go and show them my real face.

Maybe its deceit,maybe its not right,

But no longer can I alone fight,

I have some people to talk to,someone to take notice I am there,

But I can't recognize who is it I see in the mirror.

All these thoughts flashed in a jiffy,

While the woman looked up expectantly,

I heaved a sigh,and smiled my best smile,

"I  am quite different from others because....",I started the lie.

************************************************************************

In my opinion,the greatest mistake our species did was to create a Society.Social creature is the term used to describe us,but then all it has done is forcing us to be a photocopy of each other.Anyone who is different,is shunned and ridiculed.

It's not something that happens to someone particular.We all are victims and culprits.Haven't we been ignored if our thoughts don't match others and so we change to please 'them'?

And how many times have we tried to talk and find out genuinely about people who don't share our thoughts?Its not that difficult to strike a conversation with such people and become friendly with people.Who knows,you may help a person to open up and feel loved.All of us want to feel cared for,don't we?Then why look for favourites to share our care? :-)

So,all of us are different in some way,but all of us have the right to feel cared for.:-)

P.S:

Got my first salary...yippee!!!! :-):-):-)

And oh by the way,its not something that has particularly happened to me,because,as I said,we all are victims and culprits too.

So go out and make someone happy....am sure they'll make you happy when you need someone too! :-)

Cheers! Have a happy week ahead ! :-)

The blah blah and blah

I love the winter.Unfortunately,in Chennai-where I'll be working for a few years or so-there is hardly a climate that is even remotely close to a peak winter day in Delhi.Of course,winter kills too,but that's another matter.

I love the damp smell of fog that hangs about the air,the misty landscape,the chill air blowing on our faces,and the warmth that engulfs us when we get under a blanket.Wow!

The best memories of winter are the ones in Guwahati,where I would go to school at around 7 30, walking through the roads surrounded by lush greenery and the cool air.And the running around the field during the games period,throwing our sweaters/blazers on the ground.And the nights.When going to a distant temple meant fun,in that cool weather.

The winter in Guwahati isn't as wintery as in Delhi or Haryana.But it was and is certainly colder than a winter day in Chennai.

I love winter because of the sweaters too! The stockings,sweaters,jackets and Scarves! Wowieee!

*Sigh* I wish the days I spent in Guwahati can be visited again.But I guess its not the location that matters now.Its the time.And time has very little time for everyone *wink*.

P.S:
Emotional? Touchy? Not necessarily.But honestly,I feel my blog is going down in terms of my so called writing-talent.Yeah yeah I should be thankful that I have a talent and try to develop it instead of letting it develop itself.But I wonder why my hands don't play the same word games they used to do before?

*Sigh*

I guess am now inspired by the Indian Soap Operas or the deliberately sad movies that thrive and grow on the emotional "atyaachar" (torture) ;)

Cheerio! Happy Week ahead! And the best way to have a happy week is making someone happy!!!!!! :) :) :)

God is anti-social

"Dear God,am sorry to say,you're anti-social and racist!" I mumbled to myself  on a quiet afternoon.The next instant,my quiet afternoon turned chaotic when suddenly smoke filled my room and God stood in front of me,looking irritated.

"Now what's your problem?",he groaned,sitting heavily on the chair near me.

"Well,you're racist.It seems you had divided men on the basis of the jobs they're supposed to do,and look how the people treat each other now!"

"What is it I've done?",God asked,raising his voice with each word.

"Ask what you've NOT done! You should've done an MBA and you would've been able to see how your seemingly correct action of dividing men based on their jobs would later on create such repercussions on the society!"

"But...but.."

"I know you just wanted peace to reign so that people don't fight amongst themselves about who does what.But who gave you the right to utter verses that say some people who are supposed to be lower in the society are born from your feet or something like that?"

"I don't really remember if I did say that,but then what was wrong in that? If people don't have feet can they walk? No! Similarly,imagine if the supposed low caste people don't exist,how will society progress?"

"That's a very lame excuse..."

"It's not.I don't really remember that long back as I've so much to look into and my secretary is on leave too,but am sure I never wanted someone to suffer just because they belong to some group of people assigned to do certain work.Maybe I must've intended in helping people have different duties...."

"....and forgot to tell people that they're not to ill treat someone just because they have certain names and so called caste and creed",I fumed.

"Look here my child.The human mind I created is like a plant.It feeds on your thoughts.If you feed it bad thoughts,it'll make you behave badly.And it is very fragile too.It's very easy to get carried away by your own achievements,but not letting pride and vanity engulf you,being humble,being amiable to everyone is something very hard to do.Also,its very hard to say without anyone coaxing you that 'Your turn is over,now its my turn to do the job'.So you see,its not something I did.Its something the humans themselves did to others and are paying the price.It's not that I wanted some people to be happy and some to be discriminated."

I was,as always,shown how little I had known God and start accusing him.But then,something else came to my mind.

"But who told you to make the mind so fragile?Couldn't you have made it stronger?",I started on a different vein.

God sighed."Am sorry I didn't meet you before creating the human mind.How was I supposed to know that humans cannot control even a little bit of fragility of their minds!"

"Well.."

"You always keep pestering me and accusing me without thinking.I can't take it anymore! I want to resign!",He roared.

"And will I be the replacement then?",I beamed.

God paused before saying,"I think I won't resign as yet",and guffawed loudly.

I was about to say more when God surprisingly turned around and walked to the door.

"Hey where are you going?"

"To get a degree in MBA"

And He vanished.