The battle that never ends

Okay everyone! I now join thousands of people across the internet who have poured out their anger and grief over the brutal,inhuman gangrape of the 23-year-old girl from Delhi which sent shockwaves across the nation.

At the outset,I would pray for the girl's soul,and hope she has moved on to a better place.A brave,spirited daughter.Why brave? Because instead of screaming "Ma,mujhe marr jaane do! Meri zindagi barbaad ho gayee hai! (Oh mother let me die! My life is finished!)"  like the rape victims in movies and tele-serials,she whispered "I want to live".And live she does,in the heart of millions who have been closely watching the case and been praying for her.

If the previous cases of rape and molestation(such as that of the Guwahati girl) had a stricter and swifter punishment,this girl would've been alive today, because then the men wouldn't have dared to do those horrid things they did to her.But they did.

And why? Because they thought they can get away with it.Even if the girl weren't beaten up like this,and she struggled to lodge an FIR,they may just say that they were "provoked",and the Court may have "observed" that the victim was wrong by taking the wrong bus at the wrong time,and her character would've come into question.

This is the glaring truth of India.A girl is raped and the policemen ask her the details of the act.In fact,policemen act like part-time priests when they suggest the victim marry her rapist.Why? So that he and his friends will continue to rape her,but this time,she won't lodge a complaint against her own husband.Because,according to the police and the Court,marital rape doesn't exist(In fact,they don't know the meaning of the term marital rape).

Rape is hardly ever a sexual act.Its an act of a physically strong but mentally weak guy, showing how superior he is on a woman who is not able to fight back (that explains the rape of 8-year-olds to 40-year-olds).How else can you explain 6 guys forcing themselves on a woman just to "teach her a lesson" because she fought back? Or have you wondered how a man can rape a small girl of around 7 years of age (or less)?They're sick,scared and inferiority-complex-suffering people who display their misplaced sense of masculinity.

So you see? Women and their clothes don't really instigate men to rape.Then what about the street harassment that women face everyday? That happens the same even if we wear mini-skirts or saree or salwar.

The point is,in this male dominated society of our country,women have been blamed and shamed into silence.This of course makes the younger (and impressionable) minds to think that whatever they do,"sab chalta hai" (all is fair).

NOT,if the government enforces a strict law against rapists and sexual offenders.That would make the men realise that women are human beings with feelings,who feel bad when some men obscenely comment about her butt,without even caring to lower their voices;who think any woman waiting for a bus at night wants to be laid for money;who judge a woman not by the work she does but the clothes she wears.

But what would make the government to take this step when the people who constitute the governing body think a woman would like to be raped just to get compensation from the government?And also when one minister insults another Chief Minister's character openly without thinking twice?That means,the problem lies with the attitude of people in general.

Its about time that parents teach their sons about respect and consent.But the rot runs too deep to be cleaned in a generation or two.Till then,we don't know how many such 23-year-olds will get raped and killed,how many 18-year-olds will commit suicide,and how many 8-year-olds will go on battling for justice.

Till then,we keep up the fight.And hope the sacrifice of this 23-year-old--a sacrifice she made so that the people of our great country stop turning a blind eye to something as drastic as rape--doesn't go in vain.

P.S:
Yes,I am feeling helpless.But what can I do? Is anyone listening?

Hypocrites and Spirituality!!!!

In my opinion,the hypocrites are the most spiritually enlightened people on Earth.You know hypocrites? Those who don't walk their talk,who brag about themselves,who say one thing and do something else? Yeah those! How? Lets find out.....

@School

S: Hey,you know what? I've fought with H.Am not going to talk to her ever again.
Me: Why what happened?
S: Don't ask! But its so painful,I don't wanna think about her.
Me(Dutifully not asking her further): OK.

Next day.

A: Hey why haven't S and H come yet?
Me: Oh they've got some tension between them.That's what S told me.Looks like an awful fight!

The door opens,and in come S and H,linking arms and giggling like they've been best friends since birth.

And here I am thinking that they're not gonna talk to each other ever!

And this is just a small,tiny,unimportant example.There are loads of other examples.
"I don't believe in dowry,but it would be nice if you do give some gold jewelry for the wedding."
"I am a feminist,but I do believe girls should not let career be a priority in their lives"
"I am a God-fearing person".Ha ha ha.
"I give my children the full freedom to pursue whatever they want to- either Engineering or M.B.B.S".

So where does spirituality come into picture?

Hypocrites don't care about what or how other people feel about them. Thats a strong spirituality aspect- just do your own work.
Hypocrites don't think twice about being bonded by the words they've uttered.
Hypocrites don't care that they forge bonds with people with whom they've sworn off all ties.That shows how they've conquered the Ego problem! (Till the time the work is done,of course!)
Finally,Hypocrites don't care about others-after all,one should be detached from wordly attachments!

Should we be Hypocrites too then? ;-)

Cheers....Have a happy week ahead!

P.S: This post is not intended to ridicule Spiritualism or whatever has been mentioned.Just a tiny wee bit sarcasm ;-)

The power of negative

Anything negative attracts immediate attention.A negative RH of a blood group,a dip in economy,a sad ending in a movie or book-they remain in our memory for a long time.

Imagine if in the movie Titanic,Jack hadn't died while saving Rose,instead he also found some plank to hang on to and is saved....would it have had the same impact.You may argue that the destruction of Titanic was what everyone felt bad about,but then,if there had not been any tragic love story put in,the movie would've resembled a documentary.

People lamenting about their personal problems is sure to gain more attention than those who go around with a smile trying to make people happy and cheerful.Yeah,ideally everyone doesn't like a person who goes on whining.But I guess its just human tendency to feel sorry for a person on the outside,while the brain is sadistically happy that "I am not the one affected".

Even stories having a sad ending remain etched in our memories.Why is Romeo Juliet more celebrated than some other love story having a happy ending?

Being positive and seeing the positive side of any situation is the simple mantra of a happy life.But really,its not that simple.Observe how your own thoughts wander when faced with a crisis.They'll take the easier way out-thinking negatively.Its something we aren't able to control.

Very few people have this ability to see the sunshine when its raining.We think they're unrealistic,because reality is actually very dark.Thats why dark matter in space gained more attention than the non-dark matters *:-D*.

So,who is right? The unrealistic or the realistic? Is it okay to let negativity rule our lives or try fighting with it?Is it really worth it?

P.S:
Quite a confusing post,isn't it? Well,thats how my thoughts are running about too! :-D

Cheers...have a happy  POSITIVE week ahead! :)

Picture Courtesy: Google 

Being different......

"Tell me about yourself",the woman asked me,

She had this duty to evaluate my personality,

To read between the words I speak,

To know if I can interact effectively.

I had come prepared for the question,

After all,all interviews had this in common,

I was about to answer,remembering the key points,

When the question echoed again and again in my mind.

"Who are you?",my mind asked me,

I was different,I knew that from the beginning,

But being different is not something others like,

Being different makes it hard for friendships to strike.

I was not different physically,nor had I problems with speech,

And yet,alienated from others,the society did teach,

To fall in line or fall by the wayside,

There is no place to run,no place to hide.

Sitting alone,roaming by myself,had become a part of me,

Those who felt sorry for me,offered me their company,

Of course I did join them,being more than happy,

And yet,it was so painful to be asked out of pity.

I wasn't mean,nor was I rude or dominating

I was kind and quite accomodating,

But I was different,this was painfully obvious,

I was known amongst teachers,yet unknown and lost.

Till then I had accepted,I was different and alone,

But the loneliness hurt more than breaking a bone,

Slowly,wiping away my tears,I changed myself to suit others,

And I was the happiest I got friends in the process.

But no one knows who I really am,

My questions,thoughts are restricted to my mind,

A veil of pretense I have drawn over me,

Now I am scared to let it go and show them my real face.

Maybe its deceit,maybe its not right,

But no longer can I alone fight,

I have some people to talk to,someone to take notice I am there,

But I can't recognize who is it I see in the mirror.

All these thoughts flashed in a jiffy,

While the woman looked up expectantly,

I heaved a sigh,and smiled my best smile,

"I  am quite different from others because....",I started the lie.

************************************************************************

In my opinion,the greatest mistake our species did was to create a Society.Social creature is the term used to describe us,but then all it has done is forcing us to be a photocopy of each other.Anyone who is different,is shunned and ridiculed.

It's not something that happens to someone particular.We all are victims and culprits.Haven't we been ignored if our thoughts don't match others and so we change to please 'them'?

And how many times have we tried to talk and find out genuinely about people who don't share our thoughts?Its not that difficult to strike a conversation with such people and become friendly with people.Who knows,you may help a person to open up and feel loved.All of us want to feel cared for,don't we?Then why look for favourites to share our care? :-)

So,all of us are different in some way,but all of us have the right to feel cared for.:-)

P.S:

Got my first salary...yippee!!!! :-):-):-)

And oh by the way,its not something that has particularly happened to me,because,as I said,we all are victims and culprits too.

So go out and make someone happy....am sure they'll make you happy when you need someone too! :-)

Cheers! Have a happy week ahead ! :-)

The blah blah and blah

I love the winter.Unfortunately,in Chennai-where I'll be working for a few years or so-there is hardly a climate that is even remotely close to a peak winter day in Delhi.Of course,winter kills too,but that's another matter.

I love the damp smell of fog that hangs about the air,the misty landscape,the chill air blowing on our faces,and the warmth that engulfs us when we get under a blanket.Wow!

The best memories of winter are the ones in Guwahati,where I would go to school at around 7 30, walking through the roads surrounded by lush greenery and the cool air.And the running around the field during the games period,throwing our sweaters/blazers on the ground.And the nights.When going to a distant temple meant fun,in that cool weather.

The winter in Guwahati isn't as wintery as in Delhi or Haryana.But it was and is certainly colder than a winter day in Chennai.

I love winter because of the sweaters too! The stockings,sweaters,jackets and Scarves! Wowieee!

*Sigh* I wish the days I spent in Guwahati can be visited again.But I guess its not the location that matters now.Its the time.And time has very little time for everyone *wink*.

P.S:
Emotional? Touchy? Not necessarily.But honestly,I feel my blog is going down in terms of my so called writing-talent.Yeah yeah I should be thankful that I have a talent and try to develop it instead of letting it develop itself.But I wonder why my hands don't play the same word games they used to do before?

*Sigh*

I guess am now inspired by the Indian Soap Operas or the deliberately sad movies that thrive and grow on the emotional "atyaachar" (torture) ;)

Cheerio! Happy Week ahead! And the best way to have a happy week is making someone happy!!!!!! :) :) :)

God is anti-social

"Dear God,am sorry to say,you're anti-social and racist!" I mumbled to myself  on a quiet afternoon.The next instant,my quiet afternoon turned chaotic when suddenly smoke filled my room and God stood in front of me,looking irritated.

"Now what's your problem?",he groaned,sitting heavily on the chair near me.

"Well,you're racist.It seems you had divided men on the basis of the jobs they're supposed to do,and look how the people treat each other now!"

"What is it I've done?",God asked,raising his voice with each word.

"Ask what you've NOT done! You should've done an MBA and you would've been able to see how your seemingly correct action of dividing men based on their jobs would later on create such repercussions on the society!"

"But...but.."

"I know you just wanted peace to reign so that people don't fight amongst themselves about who does what.But who gave you the right to utter verses that say some people who are supposed to be lower in the society are born from your feet or something like that?"

"I don't really remember if I did say that,but then what was wrong in that? If people don't have feet can they walk? No! Similarly,imagine if the supposed low caste people don't exist,how will society progress?"

"That's a very lame excuse..."

"It's not.I don't really remember that long back as I've so much to look into and my secretary is on leave too,but am sure I never wanted someone to suffer just because they belong to some group of people assigned to do certain work.Maybe I must've intended in helping people have different duties...."

"....and forgot to tell people that they're not to ill treat someone just because they have certain names and so called caste and creed",I fumed.

"Look here my child.The human mind I created is like a plant.It feeds on your thoughts.If you feed it bad thoughts,it'll make you behave badly.And it is very fragile too.It's very easy to get carried away by your own achievements,but not letting pride and vanity engulf you,being humble,being amiable to everyone is something very hard to do.Also,its very hard to say without anyone coaxing you that 'Your turn is over,now its my turn to do the job'.So you see,its not something I did.Its something the humans themselves did to others and are paying the price.It's not that I wanted some people to be happy and some to be discriminated."

I was,as always,shown how little I had known God and start accusing him.But then,something else came to my mind.

"But who told you to make the mind so fragile?Couldn't you have made it stronger?",I started on a different vein.

God sighed."Am sorry I didn't meet you before creating the human mind.How was I supposed to know that humans cannot control even a little bit of fragility of their minds!"

"Well.."

"You always keep pestering me and accusing me without thinking.I can't take it anymore! I want to resign!",He roared.

"And will I be the replacement then?",I beamed.

God paused before saying,"I think I won't resign as yet",and guffawed loudly.

I was about to say more when God surprisingly turned around and walked to the door.

"Hey where are you going?"

"To get a degree in MBA"

And He vanished.

The end of being defensive

In the city of Kamakhya Devi,a girl is molested by a mob while the camera rolls.From the streets of the National Capital,and around it,women are told not to go out alone in the night."Don't work after 8 pm",they say.The big cops are of the opinion that men have organs that lose their control when they see any woman who smiles,talks,doesn't cover her head,smokes,drinks,drives a car,and does anything that is considered normal in any part of the world.

We all read about how the victim is blamed if she gets raped.Oh yes,the man is always innocent.Poor fellow,what can he do if she's standing too close to him in the bus?Or how dare she walk out on the streets without being cautious?Or how dare she have a drink or two?

It's not something that I am repeating from the newspapers about how a rape is reported.It's something ingrained in me too.Girls are taught at home how to try to avoid unwanted attention.
"Don't look at any guy directly when you walk"
"Look stern and strict."
"Beware of your surroundings at all times."
"Don't answer anyone."

Its a pathetic state,really.But then,do you think we can now ingrain and teach the next-gen to behave properly?Why would they do that,when their teachers are caught in such heinous acts?Where would they look for inspiration/role model to be "the perfect gentlemen"?

So,where do we go?The Police?The Law?Who follows the Law? The Law says the names and addresses of the victims should not be released to the media.What would you do when a high ranked minister commits such a mistake?Or the cops who leak such details even though they are supposed to be the upholders of the Law?

What do we do then?

We fight.

Yes.

Killing someone in self defence is not wrong.And we are defending something very important-our dignity.We are defending our right to NOT to be judged by random person about our character.We are defending our right to not let people enjoy our stories of humiliation.And finally,we are defending our right not to be groped and touched and molested just because we wear certain clothes.

Its time the molesters get to know that they need NOT fear the law,but they should fear the VICTIM.Fighting back,having a pepper spray,put the perfectly shaped nails to use,causing physical injury,and no more being the "Weaker Sex".And the basic need is also quite the toughest one-standing together and help any woman suffering,instead of turning a blind eye and thinking "Thank god its not me".

We attack till the men having the intention to molest,or those who just consider women as a collection of organs meant only for fun,sit up and take notice and start wondering why we are outraged.

We are told to be like Sita,the ideal homely woman.For centuries,we've been told to follow that.With due respect to the lady,who was strong enough to lift Parashuram's bow,lets now try to follow Rani of Jhansi,and let her be our idol for fighting against molestation.

Sometimes,we need to make the right kind of noises.This time,the noise will be theirs.And those noises will be screams for help.


P.S:
Maybe the readers think I am over-reacting,but then the feeling when a bunch of guys singing at the top of voices to get one's attention,when two guys in a two wheeler can have the courage to comment and tease a pack of 6 girls walking on the road,when a guy stares unblinking,at the inappropriate places,well,the emotions - hatred,vulnerability,fear- are unexplainable.

Have a thoughtful week ahead :)