Be like the Bee!

A honey bee,while on its quest to get its nectar to make honey,does two jobs - get the nectar,and help in cross pollination of flowers.

When nature itself has examples of peaceful coexistence,then shouldn't we,as the evolved "intelligent" race,introspect our lives too?

Imagine a big house where you live alone. A big car you drive on your own.
Exotic cuisine no one to explore with.
Loneliness being a friend is a myth.

The purpose of our lives is fulfilled when we help others directly or indirectly.What goes around,comes around. This I learnt in a short story by Enid Blyton in which one person does a good deed to another and tells him or her to " pass it on". This cycle of good deeds eventually reach back to the person ( a small kid) who started this chain! ( thank you Enid Blyton for your meaningful bedtime stories!! )

How do we incorporate that in our lives?
See that old lady afraid to cross the road?Take her hand and help her cross.See the small boy unable to reach a favourite biscuit packet in the supermarket? Just take that packet and hand it to him with a smile.See that man struggling with loads of bags with him? Help him out.See that unhappy acquaintance? Listen to her woes sincerely and offer support.

Be like the honey bee. Help others. Spread smiles!You'll not only find the honey of happiness,you'll also find the smiling flowers you've helped to blossom :-)

Cheers! Have a smiling week ahead!!
:-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

Being a Bad Friend

Okay! So this has been in my mind for many months now,but I had been delaying it purposely.After all,admitting you're a bad friend is a difficult thing to do!

Yes,am a bad friend.Like really a bad friend.And that's the reason why I hate Facebook too.I guess I show signs of the Facebook Syndrome when I say how much I yearn to have friends who would dedicate a Status,put up my pic with them,or just put up some quirky status for me....No no please don't do those now!

The point is,I am a terrible friend.I already said that,right? Going down the memory lane,I miss so many of my friends.Unfortunately am one of those silent sufferers who put up a facade of "Oh I don't care!" but deep down,the memories of a friendship haunt me,making me painfully miss my friends and those "good" times.

Have I tried to be in contact? Tried to plan some outing of sorts?Some get-together?Movie?Gossip session?I guess the answer is no.Sigh.

Maybe they don't even think about me.Oh,thats the harder part.To accept that they've moved on.How'll I go on about pulling them unwillingly to the days-that-were mode when they're like "Yeah it was.So?"

But I do remember birthdays.It's the wishing that I don't do.

Am behaving like a person out of a newly broken up relationship,ain't I?

Well,Friendship is important.To me at least.But unfortunately my vocal chords go on a holiday whenever I wish to express that "You're my friend! I always cherish your friendship!"

Oh well,time to move on for me too I guess.All this rant would do me no-good.

Wait a minute.Hey! That's an old friend of mine.She's sent a friend request! You think she remembered me,that's why send a request? Or just a random act of adding someone she knows?

That's anybody's guess!

Cheers...Have a happy month ahead!

Life after marriage

Before you jump into any conclusions regarding the title,let me assure you that yes,its meant purely for seeking attention and no, I haven't got married yet. 

Marriage is an important phase of our lives. Specially in India,where marriage is one big occasion and much hullabaloo surrounds it,marriage ceases to remain what it actually is- bonding of two people.Its so complex that everyone has just accepted it in its current and simple forms-rituals,gifts,the expectations from the bride/groom, and in some cases,dowry.But look beyond that,its just the lifelong sharing of companionship for two people,bonded in friendship and complete acceptance of each other.But is it always really just the two people?

I am digressing from what I intend to share.And that is about marriage.Not mine; but my brother's.

Am sure I'll be too happy when he gets married to whoever he likes.And thats around a year or so away,or maybe more.Just a year or so away.

I was talking to my mother about my...well...apprehensions.My brother getting married? That means he'll no longer tease me or make fun of me or irritate me? No more physical fights (OK don't worry,those are mild ones)? No more fighting about who would be driving the car? No more passing around food items to him since I can't eat more of it?No more fighting for the TV? No more laughing together at silly things?No more of his grave advices which I don't understand at all?No more verbal altercations?

My mom was surprised as I kept on asking more of such irrelevant questions.And she didn't really know how to tackle them.All she said was "We're sharing it all with a new family member na?Why are you worrying?"

I still wasn't convinced.Then my mom said "Imagine in future your husband has a sister and she also thinks like you do now,won't you be hurt?"

Of course,since my brother would be getting married first I hadn't thought about my own marriage.But that got me thinking.She had a point.

And after lots and lots of thinking,I got to understand one cliche .Nothing is life remains as it is.Niether the tangible things like house,cars or mementoes nor the intangible ones like relationships,phases and memories.All I have to do is cherish the memories,not bind it with me or try to recreate the same.It can't be done at all :)

So,I guess I should welcome the new bride (whoever he chooses),and make her feel at home in our eccentric but loving family.

I hopped upon happily with this thought,till my brother pulled my plait.

And then,a fight ensued.

God and me...talk about inequality!

"I hate you God",I grumbled.

"What's your complaint now?",God asked lightly,enjoying His cold coffee topped with chocolate ice cream.

"Why did you create women to serve men? Can't it be other way round? Don't women have any identity?Don't women deserve some care and respect?"

"What? When did I say women are born to serve men?",He asked,mildly surprised but still not leaving His cold coffee.

"The scriptures say so.Some sage has said that that's how God willed the Earth to be.With men being in command and women feeling lucky to be able to serve them.",I was almost fuming now,ready to pour out my temper.

"Hold on now,don't say like that.Let me just recollect about what happened millenia ago.....ya now I get it! Ha! See,I'll share this video with you,and you judge based on that about who did what,okay?",God handed me His super-phone to view the video.

***

Adam and Eve are resting in some garden.Adam turns to Eve and says "Hey! I don't think we can survive on fruits whole year.These take time to grow.I saw some funny looking white seeds that seems edible enough to eat.We'll try boiling them in water to clean them.I'll pick those up and we'll give it a try.What do you think?"

"You read my mind so well! I was going to seek your opinion about the same!"

Adam smiles,"Am so lucky to have you,you and I think on the same lines"

The next day,Adam is busy collecting the 'white seeds' and Eve fills water and boils it.Adam had to travel to and fro to the fields and back since he had no bag or sack to collect the white seeds.Meanwhile,Eve removed the chaffs as they seemed to taste bitter and but the seeds one by one onto the boiling water.

The seeds did seem edible but there was still some more exploration to be done.

Adam lay down beside Eve,tired, and asked her if she could massage his legs.Eve happily did it,after which a grateful Adam offered to massage Eve's neck which was aching after all the bending over the boiling water.

They found the correct way to cook rice,and taught that to their children too.

The clan grew and grew.It was established that the women will stay at home and cook,while the men bring in the raw materials.And women shall serve their partners while the men take rest.

The great-great-great-great-granddaughter of Adam and Eve once opined,"I want to go out hunting too"

Her brothers laughed,and told her to stay at home and cook.

"But why?"

"That's what your great-great-great grandmother did!",they replied in chorus.

***

I was still trying to get the meaning of the video,while God was happily licking off the cream from the glass.

"So what does this mean? Does that give you the right to write inscriptions that say women are nothing but servants for looking after home?"

God sighed."You spoiled the positive after effects of having a cold coffee.My dear Ms. Ignorant,did I write the inscriptions?"

"Well I guess you authorised some human to write",I said,feeling a little less confident.

"Then you see,thats how human beings are.They don't want to change.They like the order that has been set for them since ages to remain intact.They don't like confrontations.They don't like to try something new with each generation.They don't want to do anything else!"

"But then what is the difference between humans and donkeys?",I asked,confused.

God grinned."It's not enough to be born human.You have to prove that you are one!"

And He went off to get a blackcurrant milkshake.

P.S: 

No disregard or disrespect towards Adam and Eve.Or donkeys.Just a tiny attempt at trying to reconstruct the events based on my thoughts.

We don't know if it's right when we say women have been made to serve men since time immemorial.It can be that as the society 'progressed',the relationship between men and women became unequal,creating more of a Master and Slave,instead of having love and respect.

So let me assume that it all started fine,but somewhere in the middle,it got tangled into the monotonicity of "the tried and tested" scenario.

Do think about it once :)

Cheers! Have a happy week ahead!

Taking care of a place called home!!!

My to-do list these days include:
1.Buy milk
2.Buy vegetables
3.Buy dals
4.Pay bills
5.Empty the dustbin
6.Cook (!!!!)
7.Wash utensils
8.Cook lunch for office
9.Wash clothes
10.Switch off lights before going out

No,I am not married yet (Thank you for your well-intentioned guesses that I seem to have got married).I am living in a rented apartment which somehow transformed me from a carefree girl to a always-thinking-about-what-to-cook home-maker.

Yes,I am now a home-maker without being married.I know loads and loads of girls and woman lead such life,then what is so special about me living like this? Well nothing actually.But still,its kinda different ;)

Now my day starts with the thought for what I'll cook for lunch-actually the thought starts appearing since night,before going to bed and I get dreams about me cooking up exotic dishes for lunch! Then much of the times in office I am asked "So,what did you cook today?",with some well-meaning suggestions and advices thrown in between.In fact,once when I recounted to a colleague of mine how I forgot to add onions to my Sambar and next time forgot about the dal,she(who will be getting married in a few months),got an "insight" into the life of an early-morning-lunch-box-making young girl(and her silence indicated she's a bit apprehensive about her life post marriage :-D)

I now realise how tough it is for my mom (not just mine,but for everyone's moms)to cook and keep the home tidy and handle our tantrums and et all.Sorry mom...I won't ever pester you to make my favourite dishes the next time I am home,I'll eat whatever you cook (which would inevitably be my favourite dishes ;) )

Sometimes this freedom is exhilarating.You can cook your favourite dishes (Am I ranting too much about food??),you can throw around your things anywhere and you'll learn to be independent(Yeah,now I know whom to call when I spot a cockroach or centipede!)

On the downside,you would inevitably feel lonely(because walls have ears,not a mouth),after a hard day at work you'd wish someone would be there at home who'd take care of the dishes lying in the kitchen sink,that the dust and dirt wouldn't dance around beneath your feet,that all you got to do is come home,eat,and sleep,that you don't need to go by yourself each time the groceries reach a danger mark,and that the only other thing that talks in your home is not the TV!

*Sigh*

Circumstances(and mostly my adamant opinions and thoughts) have brought me here.Lets see where life takes me from here.Any guesses? (Please don't start about what a wonderful wife I'll be blah blah blah....I have an overdose of that talk!)

P.S:
If you have any suggestions/recipes for easy cooking(vegetarian, please) do drop in your comments ;)
Cheers! Have a great weekend :)

Why NO to learning new languages?

Recently,I was looking over the comments section of a forum wherein the discussion was about "How to stop people from using regional language in Meetings?".From just meetings,the discussion drifted to Hindi speaking vs Non-Hindi speaking people.There were people who were giving out statements like "Why should we learn Hindi?".That got me thinking.

What's so bad about learning Hindi? A lot of states speak that language.A lot of languages have words similar to those in Hindi.Don't believe me?

Tu kasa aala?
Tum kaise aaye?/Tu kaise aaya?
How did you come?
That's Marathi.

Tumar Naam Ki?
Tumhara naam kya hai?
What is your name?
That's Assamese.

Tume mo sahita asiba ki?
Tum mere saath aayoge kya?
Will you come with me?
Thats Oriya.

Tussi ki kitta?
Tumne kya kiya?
What did you do?
That's Punjabi

For all those familiar with Hindi would realise that the words are similar and can be derived 
from Hindi,to some extent at least.
Now lets get to Non-Hindi derived languages.

Unga peru enna?
What is your name?
Thats Tamil

Ninte perentaanu?#
What is your name?
Thats Malayalam
#(Sounds familar to Tamil's peru which means Name)

Avashyavaghi* koduthene
Yes of course.
That's Kannada
*(Sounds similar to Hindi's Avashya,which means the same as the meaning mentioned here)

Idhi javaabu**
It is the answer/This is the answer
That's Telugu
**(Sounds similar to Tamil's Idhu which means "this" and Hindi's Jawaab)

So you see,if we learn one North Indian language,and one South Indian language,am sure we'll be able to understand and grasp other languages more easily.After all,in this age of migration and all that,we don't want to lose out on opportunities just because of few sound movements which our tongue favours!We're ready to learn French and Japanese,right? Then why not a language nearer?From our own Country?(I know that sounds a cliched excuse.Oh well,there must be some iota of truth in it maybe ;) )

What else is language anyway? Its just a medium of communication.It won't do anyone harm if we try to learn one or two more.Its not about forcing anyone to learn.Its just being sensible :)

P.S: I am not a language expert,nor I know most of the Indian languages.But these are the very few similarities that I could find between different languages.When the languages themselves have an invisible connection amongst themselves,then what are we fighting about? :)
And also,I just picked out the examples which I thought could best support this post.And am sincerely sorry to any mistakes (I copied from online),and am sorry if anyone's sentiments were hurt (though I wonder why they should be hurt anyway?)

Cheers...Have a Happiiiieeeeeeee Week Ahead ! :)

And I thought men and women were equal

Shahrukh Khan says declares virtuously in a tea ad "From now,the actress name will appear before mine in my upcoming films."

It makes me wonder,how doing that will increase the respect for women anywhere?

Why couldn't the ad instead say "From now,the names of actress and actor will appear together".

Each day on facebook we see posts that portray women as great demi-gods,sacrificing machines,those with unconditional love...everything angelic but not humans.

Why can't we instead focus on being equals,neither great nor worse.After all,there are only two types of human beings- Man and Woman.Yes,there are biological differences,but if there is an equality instead of fight for superiority,much of the conflict would be resolved.

What do you think?


P.S: I guess this is my shortest post ever.

The line between equality and bias is sometimes too bleak to be noticed.What becomes "Equality" for one becomes "Bias" for another.After all,it's not that men are just unemotional,feelingless creatures.They have feelings too.