Tuesday, August 31, 2010

True love....

It was a winter morning,when I was out for a stroll,
that a miracle happened,and I met this girl.
Nothing unearthly about her,just a simple lady,
but her face,drove me crazy.

What a coincidence,she was my sister's friend,
what a nightmare,she may not even consider me as a friend.
She came home often,but rarely noticed me,
but just one glance of hers,greatly enticed me.

Moving the story forward,I would say we did become friends,
and you do know this,don't you?A boy-girl being just friends for long has never been a trend.
Inseparable we were,though we did have our fights,
but it was all sorted out,before the end of the night.

A particular time of ours,I would like to mention,
when it was her b'day,and we were having a celebration.
I was holding her close,and she looked so stunning,
"can I kiss you?",I couldn't refrain from asking.

She looked up at me,those beautiful eyes having tiny tears,
No,she said,and buried her head in my shoulders.
It was beautiful,we both together,
it was terrible,this moment will soon get over.

The next day,I got the message that she's left,
with her family to someplace else,and here I was,everything bereft.
What was it that took her away,what was it that she never told me?
I may have hurt her,but did I hurt her so badly?

I was angry and sad,I couldn't think,
I was going mad,it seemed I had reached my brink.
I wanted to know,why?,did i not refrain myself? 
Wasn't I loyal?And she'll have to answer all this, herself.

Skipping the part as to how I found her out,but she was now somewhere in a village,
living a life of a saint,till she saw my broken image.
She seemed more pure,more heavenly,more beautiful,
but her presence there still surprised me.

We sat down on a bench,not knowing what to say,
the sun setting down,the sky a wonderful gray,
"I know why you've come,to get your answers,
you deserve them,but its better we go separate ways,as I suffer from aids"

"I was true to you,but long back,I had an accident,
that was when I was given blood that was infected,
I couldn't say no to your love,but I couldn't spoil your life,
now you know the reason,why I cant be your wife."

My world fell apart,not because I wanted her body,
but to think that,she had been through such agony.
"listen here,no matter what,you're mine and I cant let go,
I would still say this,that I want to be with you"

Disbelief and gratitude came as tears in her eyes,
once again she buried her face on my shoulders,
and again I asked,"can I give you a kiss"?
By way of an answer,she lifted her face,and let me tell you,that feel still remains afresh.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Are we raising a generation of Burnt Out Children?

This is my topic for presentation in "Communication Skills Lab" in my college.Here,I have presented my views on the topic as I have understood it.Your views may differ with the topic,and you are free to put forth your own views....(Sorry for the loooooong length!)

Childhood is the most colourful phase of one’s life. We learn by making mistakes. We grow mature gradually, not abruptly. It’s the carefree time of our life. When we have real hobbies passions and dreams. Sadly, that’s all changing.

In earlier days, life was never controlled by tests, tuitions, exams and such things. Parents had time for their children. Life wasn’t all about getting a job in a big company with a big pay cheque. People pursued what they liked. Intelligence wasn’t counted by which college you got into. Children behaved like children, with thirst for knowledge.

Nowadays childhood has a different meaning altogether. It’s dominated by being the smartest, tuitions, hobby classes, peer pressure and what not. Childhood is now a complicated phase.

The ‘intention’ behind pushing the children hard is to ‘nurture’ them to face the competitive world. Developing talent is not a sin; it will help the child in his future. It is a trickledown effect from the kind of competition experienced for entry into engineering colleges, graduation and others. Today’s world demands ordinary people with extra skills to survive. As Darwin`s theory says-natural selection or in other words survival of the fittest.
The basic needs of childhood are, time to play, place to play and explore the world through his eyes. In the name of competition we are raising fatigued, stressed, and overburdened children with no sound moral values. The stress is resulting into children engaging in all kinds of derogative acts.

Competition is such that today`s world demands good grades in schools, colleges to get a good job to earn their living. Competition is the need of the hour, we can`t deny that but what is worrying is the fact that parents push their children to their limits which makes children’s life tougher. Parents need to understand that everyone has different capabilities. Every individual has a special quality. Instead of encouraging that skill, parents want their children to achieve what they themselves couldn’t achieve.

Today parents don`t have time for their children to listen to them. Teachers demand work within a short period of time. So it makes students life tougher. And then we have tuitions as we need ‘extra skills’ to get through competitive examinations apart from regular classes in school. And what make matters worse are higher expectations from parents and teachers alike. Parents and teachers force students to take part in extracurricular activities which in turn increases load on children. 

In the name of making the Education System more student-friendly, the students are actually made to bear more stress. The teacher-student relationship is now warped. The insecure student’s mind is now more than confused. Bundled up with an emotional dilemma with the pressure of performing well, the students eventually burn out. Their identity is lost.

Instead what the education system should do is train the teachers such that the student-teacher rapport is impeccable. Exams are important, yes. They make you able to face failures. But that does not mean exams should be made such a big issue that students commit suicide when their results don’t meet their parents expectations.

People should also understand that stress management is not a subject that can be taught. Children burdened with such high expectations are also expected to ‘handle’ pressure well enough. But what would an 11 year-old know about what is stress?

Peer pressure has been present since earlier times. But now suddenly it has become an important issue. More so because the peer pressure now is not as healthy as it should be. The only question that arises is: Is being better than your neighbour’s/relative’s/friend’s child would imply that the child in question is intelligent?
Here come the so-called Reality Shows. The reality shows on TV show how much a child has been put through and how broken he/she becomes. That’s another thing that bothers children-the inability to perform, or in other words, the fear of failure. The young and impressionable mind is now also a diffident mind. Parents fight on camera saying their child has been voted out due to favoritism, whereas they should be with their child and telling him or her that it’s okay to fail and should boost their confidence.

It is true that competition is growing day by day but childhood is the age for playing, making friends, etc. Of course, things are changing and CBSE has taken the right step by providing Board exams as optional for students and introducing grading system that may reduce the stress among students. But the main step should be taken by parents by giving their children care and guidance at home. It’s time they open their eyes to see their children yearning for their love. Teachers can make studies more entertaining by taking real life examples and interacting more with students to give them the comfort they want.

It’s not really the children’s fault; after all, they just observe what goes on around them.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Just because she's a girl

Sitting on the bench,the little girl was alone,
her face showed how quickly she had grown,
although she was still small and fragile,
after all, she was still a child.

I went up to her and sat by her side,
her innocent eyes opened up wide,
i smiled,and she returned it,
now she seemed more relaxed.

"why arent you playing,dear?",
i asked,pointing to others who were playing in that park,
she shook her head,
"am not allowed to play",she said.

"but why?"i asked,surprised,
she looked up,a confusion appearing in her eyes,
"if i play,then who'll look over my little brothers there?",
she looked in the direction where her brothers played.

"but when do you play then?"i asked,still perplexed,
"i dont,i help my mother cook,",the girl replied,
"and look after my brothers",
there was an innocent pride in those words.

"dont you go to school?",i asked,more interested,
"i do,though my mother doesnt like me getting educated,
but i want to study more,
but thats not possible for sure".

"hey come fast you stupid girl",we heard someone calling,
she jumped in fright and replied,stammering,
"am coming mother,just a minute",
she turned to me and waved,shyly apologetic.

"but why do you do all this?dont you feel sad?",i asked near tears,
she stopped in her tracks hearing my words,
she turned around,and gave a smile so mature,
"thats because am a girl"

I went home that day, disturbed and upset,
I didn’t know why suddenly i was filled with regret,
My little daughter came running up to me,
"Can we go and play mummy?"

I shook my head, unable to say a thing,
For an unknown reason, my heart was grieving,
I don’t know how my daughter knew that I wasn’t happy,
but she said, it’s okay, I'll play with daddy!

Looking back now ,I was a pampered child,
the young daughter, I was never obedient and always wild,
I did whatever I wanted,
and my family always supported.

I was successful, and now i was married and loved,
but thinking about that little girl, my heart moved,
‘coz she simply did what was told to her,
just because she was a girl.

I was happy ,as I was never burdened,
I was happy, as I never sacrificed,
but today I was defeated by this little woman,
who bonded with me for no reason.

The next day I went in search of that girl,
and I found her again, sitting alone,
without preamble, I said "Come with me, I'll help you get whatever you want,
I'll fulfill whatever your demands" 

She was shocked to say the least, to see my sudden outburst,
she stared at me for some time, and said "I can’t come".
"Why can’t you?" I asked angrily, "You still want those who insult you so easily? I'll help you, why don’t you understand,
I’ll do for you whatever I can"

The girl looked at me and asked,
"Will you leave your family if they treat you badly?",
I was stunned had never thought like this,
it was like she had jolted me from my dreams.

Would i leave my husband if he slapped me once?
Would i not forgive when my children ask for forgiveness?
What’s the diff between the girl and me?
Like me, she too loved her family. 

"I was told by my grandma, girls shouldn’t be unforgiving,
it’s in their blood to be caring,
it’s an honor for a girl when she helps her family,
‘coz her help is the one that no one can repay easily"

I drank in this piece of wisdom, coming from this child so young,
I realized though we were far apart yet were wound,
by a thread so delicate but strong,
but my assumptions about this girl were just proven wrong.

She was happy with her family, even though they treated her badly,
maybe she hoped someday they'll be sad,
for all the words they said to her,
but she'll tell them she doesn’t bother.

Her mother, who had been listening all the while,
came running to her child,
she held her in her close, not letting go,
maybe she wanted to say more, but all she said was, “I am so proud of you"

Monday, August 9, 2010

Can't think of a title

The sound of laughter filled the rooms,
The pitter-pat of little feet all around,
Silence was allowed inside,
Only by the guard of night....

The children were there,
all different from one another,
but they all had one thing in common,
they had no one-no mother,no father,no brother,no sister.

Yes,they were orphans,with nobody to call as their own,
They were orphans,some with families they've never known,
All with a different past,a different gene,
All with a same future,at least for the time being....

They don't know whether to be happy or sad,
when one of their friends is adopted,
when the friend gets a new family,
but isn't it normal to feel some jealousy?

Young or old,lucky or not,this is their place for a while,
No matter how much they hide,
 the sadness of their life,
you can see the want of love,omnipresent in their eyes.....