Wednesday, July 29, 2009

All I need is....You

I never said,I never expressed,
Every emotion I suppressed,
I tried to show I can live without you,
But all I need is you...

I turn away from you,not wanting to look into your eyes,
They can see that I am telling you lies,
I laugh,I smile,I seem happy to every person I am talking to,
But deep down inside,all I need is you....

I hate it when you say you love me,
I hate it when you say our friendship is for eternity,
I was proud as I thought I needed no one to see life through,
But now I say,all I need is you...

I don't want to see that you are worried for me,
I don't want you to know what you mean to me,
Its all pride, and its all ego,
But put them aside,all I need is you...

I hate you when you don't listen,
I hate you when you don't say anything,
I hate you when you say the only person who knows everything about me is you...
But,I need you.

Don't be hurt by my silence,I am a wounded soul,
Don't try to heal me,I would strike back with words too hurtful,
Don't push me to be smiling forcefully when instead tears would flow
Just keep this in mind,I need you....

Sunday, July 26, 2009


Have you ever travelled to Tawang in Arunachal Pradesh? It takes two days to travel from Guwahati to Bomdila and then to Tawang.Its nearly on the border between India and China (forgive me if I am wrong...I used to sleep during the geography classes :P).
Well,the sights are wonderful...but at times one gets this the only road to reach that place? One landslide or one heavy snowfall can cut-off that town from the rest of the country!

When you are on your way to Tawang through thick forest and hardly any life,abruptly at some place pops up a temple and a little shop beside it.In the middle of the jungle.You can't help but wonder about the priest in there and the shopkeeper.As always,one gives the simplest explanation:"They are used to it".

Again,at the point where the grassy cover abruptly gives way to snow,you find a little shop where they make tea and have a large stock of Maggi Noodles! Cold wind,cold weather,snow all around and then hot Maggi and tea!!

Seriously,thats one trip that I would like to undertake.Not to see the "Madhuri Lake"(Supposedly the lake where some song was shot for the movie Koyla starring SRK and Madhuri Dixit :P)...nor for the snow-snow all around...but for the long travel through 2 states..Assam and Arunachal Pradesh...which still reminds me of the pretty narrow roads across mountains...where one wrong turn would take us down,and one landslide would take us up.

Have you ever travelled to Panipat in Haryana? From Delhi.Its not really any spectacular place...but again,the journey from Delhi to Panipat is pretty much enjoyable...for me at least.Thats where my home is.:)

Imagine travelling in peak winter afternoon (when its cold in delhi although theres a warm sun).
And as you go on and on,see the fields covered in a misty haze,the smell of winter air,and in the middle of that,the smell of hot aloo parantha with fresh makhan on top it when you stop by at a Dhaba....too good!

In summers,you would see Sunflowers smiling at the sun,and Sarso(I don't know what to call it in English :( ) and dusty roads...still,its lovable!

Out of nowhere pop up some villages,buffaloes,dhabas etc etc...and one would be glued to the window!

I always love going to signifies going home!:)

From Panipat,its the road to Kurukshetra thats pretty cool.Huge trees lined up on either sides,a smooth if someone is making you relax!

Beyond Kurukshetra,you get to go to Ambala then Chandigarh,and though their roads are pretty good too...still,my favourite remains Delhi-Panipat-Kurukshetra.:)

Have you been to Shillong in Meghalaya? Its a cool some place where anyone would have denied that life existed.Tilted roads,overcrowding vehicles in narrow lanes...really...fabulous!

More than that,its the journey to Cherrapunji from Shillong.The road seems to stretch on and on,and the mountains seem to look upon you with curiousity.Higher and higher,you go on,until you see the clouds on the roads and your vehicle zooming past them:Thats indication enough that you have arrived at the world's most wettest place.The clouds had covered the whole view of the Seven Sisters' Falls...and just as we were about to turn back,the curtain drew back and we could see the (more than)Seven-Sister's Falls! Spectacular View.

As you go on,you would see little-big houses,and you can't help but wonder and envy the people living in them...they are lucky in a way...they've got their own world...

Have you travelled to Pondicherry? Well I don't really remember much of it,but I do remember a road running parallel to the seaside.And the sea looks pretty inviting too! :).
Once in Pondicherry,you wonder you are really in India or not.Seriously,the streets look fact...most of the things look a bit different! Houses,buildings,roads..etc etc!

Its one journey where I found the sea by my side...just one stop and one can run to the beaches! :)

And in all of these trips,its the journey that has enthralled me always......
They teach loads of things,right?
The mysterious roads to Tawang seem to tell about life...where at times one has no other option but to follow one path.It can be dangerous,but if we are steady enough and catch hold of ourselves from falling over,we get what we want (Like the Maggi Noodles! :) )
They also tell us to go on,through twists and turns and scary phases....and not to stop!

I don't know what the roads to-and-fro Panipat tell...but let me put it to diversifying our lives.(Well,because there are 3 lanes on either side! :D)

The roads to-and-fro Shillong-Cherrapunji tell about those times in life where going further just when we thought everything was over can change our lives around.(I don't know why,but it seems so to my Head the clouds whispered to me to go further.)

The Pondicherry roads tell about taking a break at times in life...and enjoy the seaside view!

So what other roads tell about? I don't know...most roads are pretty arrogant and don't talk shows in their loopholes! :P


1.There are other roads which I would love to mention too....but I can't find the words for them.
I'll surely write about them too(when I get the words;for now,the words are flying :P)!
You also tell about the roads/trips which have remained in your heart and why?

2.If you are confused whether I was talking about the roads or the journey...then...well journey takes place on roads...right? :D

Have a happy and smiling week ahead! :)

Friday, July 24, 2009

I guess I should not write anymore...huh??

Nope.I don't have anything to write.

But I do feel like writing!( be precise,typing)

But why should I write just to see something-like-an-essay types thing on my computer screen?

Why should I catch hold of buzzing thoughts (buzzing like flies indeed) and hold them till I type out something about them and then let go of them?("Them" means thoughts).

Why should I struggle to keep awake when I could be happily dozing off...

Why do you like to read whatever I type {Err...Is that right?}(But you always follow the No-Comments mode,of course!)

I'll tell you why...Because I don't know!(HeeHee)

I guess almost every human being has the tendency or desire to share things.Its like talking about or writing about some things makes them easier to handle!

Hey seriously! When you are travelling in a train,for example,the person sitting near you starts a conversation(Or you start),and it goes on and on...and you find that you had talked more than necessary.
Or even while standing in a queue..."The climate is becoming inbearable,isn't it?"
Or outside an entrance exam centre..."My son is appearing for the exam.We came all the way from XYZ for this exam...You also don't look like natives of this place,am I right?"
Or while waiting for the bus.."Whats the time?Oh! Its so late ?The bus should've been here at this time! They just pluck money and give us no service,don't you think so?"

And it goes on.

So some sort of a bond (Not James Bond or Ionic Bond or Covalent Bond) is formed...which can be easily formed,and which when broken doesn't really give much pain....ain't it?We just want to talk to someone,we can't isolate ourselves.But out of nowhere,these people sometimes come into our thoughts and we wonder about them...ain't it?

Huh...but why I am telling you all this? I am sure you won't think about what I said anyway (Boooohooooo).

As I said earlier...I am not writing anymore.

Wait for my next post :P

Saturday, July 18, 2009

All my fate!

Now we are going to connect the wires and see the result...yikes! The electricity is gone!

I am telling to a friend"For the past few days the clouds have all been just hovering overhead,but they don't rain...So it won't rain today also"
I suddenly found a tiny drop on my hand....and the next rained Rhinos and Elephants.

Sitting in the class,someone was saying "I hope ma'am doesn't ask us for our observation notebooks,I haven't completed it"
I,being the loudspeaker,said"Relax,today ma'am is absent.Even I haven't completed my observation"
The next moment,the "ma'am" appears out of nowhere and says "All of you,submit your observation notebooks,and those who haven't completed them,will be marked zero!"

One evening in the hostel,I told my roomies,"You go and eat.Today is Wednesday,the food won't be good,I don't feel like eating"
An hour later,they returned and said"You should've come,the food was good today.They changed the menu."

And at all these times(and other such times),I always found somebody giggling at my plight.Yeah,you got it...its The Almighty.

Seriously,nowadays I tell everyone something and add it with "Since I am SAYING it,it won't happen" and to negate THAT statement,whatever I say does happen.:P

Some people say things that actually turn out to be true...but yours' truly never listens to them,and those people give me "I-told-you-so" looks :P.

So all in all,whenever I think this is really going to happen,something unbelievable incident happens that ruins all my plans and I end up asking Him "Why,why only me?Can't you target someone else?"

And all I hear is more giggling.

Well does this happen to you all too? I mean this happens to me ALL the time...Does it happen that whatever you say never really happens??

Awaiting your answers...and if I am right,you all would reply.:P


Please read the poem in my previous post.Arre yaar,it was a moment of Eureka when I got the idea for the poem :P

Enoy your day

Friday, July 17, 2009

In a far desolate office,
Sat one lonely officer,
Who was suddenly summoned one day by his seniors,
To get feedback on the new project they had proposed...

The officer reached the other office,
Having fans that moved too slow and needed air themselves,
Tubelights that flickered and fumed at having to work,
And chairs that creaked at the slightest stress..

The officer was summoned in front of other similar officers,
Who looked tired and bored,
Who looked like men already tired of life,
And like those who wondered with dread what the future had in store..

"Ah,sit down" said an officer to our protagonist,
And as our officer sat down and handed out the project feedback,
The other officers hardly glanced at it,
But one said "Tell,has the project been successful?"

Our officer took a deep breath,and managed to fake a smile,
"Of course,your wonderful ideas on saving environment,
Have been very much effective,
And the actions taken have indeed been a great accomplishment..

Schools,colleges and offices,
Have all been given pamphlets asking them to plant trees,
They have also been told to not to use plastics,
And they all are indeed listening

School-going children and college students,
Are all enthusiastically studying Environmental Science,
And I am also happy to tell you that they all clear the exams,
Though they always fail in other subjects otherwise....

After studying the subjects,and seeing those pamphlets,
The citizens -young and old,
Have all changed their mindsets,
And use only dustbins to throw those very pamphlets!

And so I conclude,sir,
That our project has been successful,
And I am sure that our claim to save our environment,
Would now be nearly truthful!"

The other officers exchanged happy glances,
And they all nodded their heads,
"Your report is precise and clear officer",said one of the officers,
"You may now leave"

As our officer walked out,he couldn't help but think,
"What the hell am I doing?Doesn't anyone have sense?
How are we going to do any job like this?
Where we are afraid to tell the truth and hide behind a cloak of pretence?

What would children gain,reading books on environment,
When actually they should see,
Farmers struggling for water and some improvement,
In their parched lands...

What would students do?Writing exams and forgetting everything,
When they should hear the cries,
Of the literally-drowning-in-water polar bears,
Since the heat is melting away the caps of ice.."

The officer shook his head,and went on his way,
Dejected and disappointed and frustrated,
If only he had stayed a little longer,he would have other officers say,
"What a waste! We are hiring such fools to do this job?"

"What does he think,can one do with books and pamphlets,
Or exams and quizzes and fashion shows?
When the heat is rising,and so are the prices,
Really,what are we doing to ourselves by hiring such fellows?"

A note by the poster...err I mean the blogger!:P
(The title and the post has no Kismat Konnection :P)
Hmm...I am back!! I got my results,I am an 8-pointer! Wow! And I passed in maths too!(Refer to "In God we trust,Grumble we must" post for knowing the reason for the maths-mentioning!

I don't really know what I wish to convey through this poem(poem?) of mine..But in case anybody's sentiments are hurt (including the Polar bear's) I am sorry for that...but seriously..I think just conducting huge shows on "Save the planet"-having mutliple lights and loads of sounds-;or any great quizzes or presentation contests or seminars won't really help.

We got to,ought to,should,must,etc etc do our bit for making our planet a lot cooler.(Yo man! :P)

And for this I don't want to join any clubs,but what I do want you to do is join your eyelids with your eyeballs(I mean close your eyes) and you like your place to be all metal and glass and artificial...or would you like it natural,green and cool?
(By the way,switching off lights when not in use and all such stuffs reduce your electricity bills!)

Have a cool weekend!:)

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Sometimes in life...

Sometimes in life,we have to let go,
Some that we live in the present,
Sometimes in life,we have to show,
Courage and sense when everything is falling apart...

Sometimes in life,we need to smile and be happy,
When inside our heart is breaking,
Sometimes in life,we need to forgive,
No matter how much someone is hurting...

Sometimes in life,we have to be strong and graceful,
To witness our own defeat,
Sometimes in life,we have to be gracious and humble,
Even when we have had our greatest win...

Sometimes in life,we need to open up and talk,
Even though all we need silence,
Sometimes in life,we must be quiet,
To convey our condolence...

Sometimes in life,our shoulders are needed for someone to cry,
When we ourselves have not been offered any solace,
And often in our lives ,we find ourselves alone,
And for all troubles,we have no option but to put up a brave face...

But always,we should be thankful and smile,
For all the things we have had in our life,
Because all our possessions stay with us only for a while,
But our true character remains with us night and day,come what may....

P.S:I guess its a bit of a sad set of rhymes...but I am feeling a bit down-down right now :(

Have a happy week ahead! :)

Monday, July 6, 2009

No title...Why don't you suggest one? :D

"And from now on,you all would be having daily tests!",our class coordinator said,giving us a wide smile.
I stared at her...I just couldn't think of any reason why she was giving that big smile.Here I was,wishing that our college would treat us like college students by NOT conducting those stupid tests which aren't of any use....and there she was,smiling as though she has found treasure.

My head feeling heavy,my steps not so eager,I reached my hostel after the torture (read: classes) and I was so irritated that I had intended to complain to my mother about my college.Well,thats the best thing I do next to crying : Complain.

I got hold of my mobile and gave my mother a Missed Call.{Well,okay,I admit it;I am a kanjoos (Miser)}. The next moment,she called back with that cheery "Hello!".
I said "How are you,Ma? Are you doing some work?"

She replied "Oh not really.Tell me"

Just as I was about to begin my round of complains,my head faced a whirlpool of thoughts....

What am I doing here? I still haven't accepted my life here? Or have I? When will I stop complaining and start living? What great thing did I do that I have to complain about some silly rules,some undigestable food {Exaggerated},some black water in our taps,some lack of holidays,some silly dress code,and some more of the little teeny-weeny things? Have I been sent here forcefully? It was my fault that I screwed up my exams last year (Boards and entrances,I mean),my fault that I didn't do well,my fault that I didn't speak up and say No when I was being sent here...
And what are the BIG problems here anyway? The rules? We'll break them! The food? We'll survive! The lack of holidays? Okay,lets take pride in that....I go home once in every 5 months and live there for only a week...and when my parents come here,its only for a day or two.All right then,ain't I great?

Does every problem have a solution?{Well,I guess except for our politicians!}
Of Course!!!
Each and every lock has a key,and each thing that God does to us is only to strengthen us...blessed are we that we are punished by Him,this means he is taking notice of us!!!(HeeHee)

I'll also show my parents that I am not the Taare Zameen Par case of homesickness...(I mean the initial one.) I am living here too,surviving,cost-cutting,reading novels,Blogging despite such huge assignments,and not to forget my partners in crime! What else do I need Ma,What else?

"Hello?? Anu!!!! If you are not going to reply,I'll disconnect!!!"

I shook myself from the reverie and said "My day was great Ma! You know what? They are going to start daily tests in our college! As if we are really going to clear THOSE!!!"

This post was not really meant for doing some self-praising(Though I nearly got close to that).What I wanted to convey was that despite huge problems,we still survive(We means Human Beings,and not WE only!).Somehow or the other,the next day dawns,the next sunset comes and again the next day comes back.So its upto us whether rise with each sunrise or fall with each sunset.

No offence meant to my college.Just that we all (The Respected Students) are so fed up of the rules that we are sure to bring down the result collectively and without efforts (Unity is Strength).

Some people ask me,why are you so obsessed about Hostel Life?
Well,because like the Public is so obsessed about Sensational News because its New,
Like that I am also obsessed about my hostel life...coz its new...for Me!


Saturday, July 4, 2009

Sweet Revenge

(1) This post is specifically for one and only one person.That guy would surely comment and reveal his identity....that dumbo!!!!!
(2) Hey Freelancer/Mridu bhaiya/{or whatever other names you've got},don't get me wrong after seeing this post and thinking: arre,aisa kaam toh maine apne blog par kiya tha(kisi ko gaali dene ka,I mean)!!!
(3)This post is subject to anytime deletion.

Yes,I am talking about You.Yeah you,you stupid snake-catcher/killer,you self-proclaimed fast rider,self-proclaimed fearless person,self-proclaimed-in-love person.I am talking about you.Oops,I am talking about the most most most idiotic and vain and brainless creature ever to exist in the whole wide universe!!!

Talking to you has made my head go haywire,my self-confidence commit suicide and my self-esteem has been arrested and sent to jail.All because of you.Thank you very much.

What the hell you think of yourself,huh? You are the only snake-catcher or killer in the whole-wide world ah? When I told you that even my cousin bro n sis catch snakes but don't kill them,your reaction was:Ah,they must be some silly baby-snakes,not venomous...but I catch the venomous snakes.You just wait,I'll have it arranged that you are pushed in a big container having loads of poisonous snakes in it and those snakes won't be much friendly to you.

And you are the ruddy rash driver ah?? I'll show you what rash driving is...or in fact,just show me how you drive in the Chennai traffic and let me see how you survive here.

And oh I forgot.For you everyone else is just a brainless or characterless guy and everything I do is just a joke:
"Who participates in Global Warming Awareness Competitions man?"
"Why are you adding music to your slides?This is not a wedding that you are adding music!"
And when I told you that I had spoken in front of everyone and that I just blabbered and felt ashamed of it...the only reaction I got (instead of saying something like "Its ok" or "Forget about it"): "Once I was given a mic to speak about something and I just stared at it and came of the stage".

And the major thing that caused the provocation
"Hey that tennis sir of yours was no good"
I ask my other readers,how would you feel that the coach or teacher(however he/she is/was) is being talked about in such a manner ? I mean when I was telling about the sir once praising me and me doing well in the game....imagine my feelings after hearing this.

I can gurantee you that the person I am talking about will immediately comment and say "Hey you misunderstood me,main toh bas mazak kar raha tha(I was just jokin)"
Or he would opt for the easy way out "All right,I'll never talk to you again"

As if snapping all contacts would surely make everything fine ah?

I need answers!

Again to all my readers....I don't want you all to think bad of this friend of mine.(Yeah he is still a friend...though whenever I am just about to begin to tell my share of sorrows after he has poured his heart out,something or the other happens resulting in me thinking that this fellow ain't interested in listening to me).

Its called Vidhi.Fate.You always end up getting the wrong person or the wrong things out of the right person when you yourself are searching for someone to share your day's sorrows and happiness.

Well by the way...the purpose of my blog was just to vent out my anger.Coz I can't push the friend off a cliff,or throw him out of airplane,or strangle him with my hands,or make a thousand hungry dogs chase him,or make him consume arsenic...or just anything.So I guess I ought to contended just writing over here about the one person who has made my brain resign from its post and leave my Head Office empty.


P.S:The person whom I am talking about is.....a human being!(I think so....coz earlier he seemed to be human,but now its getting pretty much obvious that the guy is a devil!)

Friday, July 3, 2009

Yipee...I am about to be a senior !!!

Finally...the day arrived when I could proudly (though not without wondering about any possible appearance of any arrears in the first year 2nd sem exams....heehee) write my name and beneath that mention that I am a student of EEE(Electrical and Electronics Engineering) of the 2nd year.

So how it felt to be a "senior"? Well actually,we would be officially seniors only when we get the juniors :P..But still,who cares???

But entering into our department (OUR department!) and facing our core subjects is a bit exciting and a bit scary at the same time. Scary because of the practicals and the subject names themselves (Like Electro-Magnetic Theory,Measurements and Instrumentation,and the best of all...Data Structures and its Analysis {or was it Applications?}).For now,I am feeling so grand and happy and anxious and scared that I do not know whether to laugh or to slap my head in tension...(HeeHee,I guess I'll always be a bit childish....still its good to be that way!)

It has been my dream that I do engineering.Because of a Maths teacher telling other students that "This girl would surely join Arts"(because I always used to fail in Maths in the lower classes in school and do well ONLY in languages!).And mostly because I always saw my father suddenly getting a phone call in the middle of the night saying "Theres a problem in this Control Valve and that Pressure Valve" and he used to rush to the rescue!

Yeah of course,on the other hand,Engineering is one of the most most most common thing that students opt for.I don't need to repeat cliches (Pronounced as Kleeshays,meaning a statement repeated again and again or something like a common saying---Aishu,this is for you) about WHY do people take up engineering.(or do I?)

It seems the Honourable government (Honourable indeed!) is thinking of introducing Medicine and Law in the IITs.That would be a good move I guess,considering the fact that half the population of India slogs to get into the IITs and take up ANY kind of now one half of THAT half may try to get into the medical or law courses of the IITs...which would imply that finally a lot more students MAY really want to take up Medicine or Law(?)
Lets see what happens.

I feel like a hypocrite right now.Seriously.I also had slogged(not really,not much,not enough) to get into the IITs but no I wasn't successful.And in the second attempt this year,I had got qualified for the Extended Merit List.But now that there isn't any hope for changing the college,I am again back to the pavillion of calling the ones slogging to get into the IITs as .... boring and uninteresting !!

Its like we are crushing our own ambitions and our own thoughts and what not just to get something materialistic...ain't it? Many people tell me that you haven't seen the real world,that you have always been protected,you don't know about the sacrifices one has to make to be able to survival etc etc etc..but stubborn and idiotic and adamant and ignorant that I might know what my reaction to those statements would be!(HeeHee)

OOPS!(I am not talking about Object Oriented Programming..thats for Computer Science & Engineering waale yaar!!)....See again! I have drifted off the topic again(Oh Anu,you are so considerate to stop the post here!!! Oh god I am so modest!!! hee hee)

Okay,while I go and figure out just what exactly are we supposed to do for deleting an element from a List(arrey...I am talking about an Array!!!) you figure out what you are going to do for making your lives interesting if you land in the wrong job!!!(OR are already in one.)


P.S:I am seriously not joking about this...but